BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE

For a long time, I had a strange but strong feeling that I was so different among other people.But that thought gave me little confidence and a lot of distress. It wasn't sudden, but gradually I became more sceptical about myself. I used to think a lot, talks to myself and valued my space or the 'me time' more than anything. Conversations with people who were not in my close circle made me uncomfortable. I realised that, functions with a lot of people who were out of my 'close circle' is out of my comfort zone. Relatives often complained me for not having an "ushaar" ( I couldn't find the appropriate word for that). 

That even led to underestimation and comparison with the children of my age. This made me feel that I had a serious problem.

I never thought of sharing this 'internal conflict' of mine to parents. 

Because I have seen them nodding to that comments the others make as if they agree that their son had a problem. 

But I can't blame my parents for that. Still I need to know what was bothering me.   It was then, when I was studying in highschool, I happened to read a book in which, a Gujarati boy who used to run from school to home to avoid conversations with people, later became the leader of a great nation and paved the way to its freedom. The book was "My Experiments with Truth". It was a relief to know that there were more people like me. But that wasn't enough. It took a couple of years for me to hear the word "introvert". Google says, "An introvert is often thought of as a quiet, reserved, and thoughtful individual who prefers minimally stimulating environments and they need time alone to recharge".

That's it.

Its so natural to become like that. There are  millions of people like this. Anyway that was so relieving.

Also knowing the fact that several personalities who I admire belongs to this category finally corrected the biggest mistake I made in my life.

Everybody is awesome of their own. 

But what really hurts is the judging mentality of the society.

Introverts are often considered as weak and are prone to comparison with extroverted guys.

Some people consider them as good for nothing fellows. And there is an absurd concept that they are calm and quiet outside and crooked and evil inside because they are soft-spoken!

All I have to say that, in our society, the judging of others on character, looks, colour and grades may end or maybe not. But its important for an individual to accept him/her as a whole.

If we don't love ourselves then how  can we expect others to love us?